Don’t you dare tell me..

There is no such thing as ‘emo.’ Ok, so maybe not in that terminology, because it’s really not a practical label but you have to try and understand me. How do I know there is? I myself went through that pathetic stage. It was over a year ago this month.

I want go into the irrelevant details; I’ll keep it short. I went to the plaza a fair bit, to try and ‘scope’ out these emo boys with my friends. It wasn’t until I met one in particular I started to try and be one. Dying my hair black, cutting a mullet, wearing everything black, you know what I mean. It wasn’t until 6 months ago I realized how entirely pathetic that was in itself. I didn’t just change to suit them, I changed my morals, I lost friendships, all for the sake of fitting in with the out crowd.

Before this, I was a real outdoors type of person. I was tanned, I had waist-long light brown/blonde hair and I was happy. I really don’t know why I changed but I did.
I wasn’t on myspace but then, because I was never home, but as I changed, I got myspace and suddenly, I was as pale as white, hair as black as when you close your eyes and I was getting called emo. Believe it or not, I didn’t mind. When I got myspace, I got a camera.
For obvious reasons.

I was gross. I was depressing. I was the complete definition of a person who follows. I can’t even remember what that was like. I wanted so bad to fit it.

You might be thinking: what’s the actual point of this? My point is, people are continually saying “DON’T JUDGE ME” and shit. But, seriously – who are you kidding? You WANT people to say your ‘emo’ or ‘scene’ etc. I hate the fact that I know I changed to fit in, yet people can scream, rant and rave and say they did it for themselves, and they are entirely original. Give me a break. People like that are only trying to convince themselves.

Lucky to say, I’m finished with it. I’m finally getting tanned again, and my hair is now brown, blonde and mahogany. No black. My ‘mullet’ is growing out, and my hair is finally bra strap-length. I’m sick of the ‘emos’ and I wish that one day everyone will finally fucking wake up and go back to being themselves. Yes, I obviously still use myspace, but never to the degree where I sit here all day adding emos and writing “I love black” and “suffocate me” everywhere. I was a joke, a laughing stock and It’s embarrassing knowing I was like that.

Anyway. This is written in no more then feelings being expressed. No hard literature or in depth explanation. This is pure anger and exhaustion combined.